Screaming Kids Driving You Nuts? Four Rules to Help You Keep Your Sanity!

Homeschool Catalog - Screaming Kids Driving You Nuts? Four Rules to Help You Keep Your Sanity!

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Often I will hear parents say, "I just ignore Jr. When he has a fit or screams."

What I said. It isn't the actual final outcome that the true about Homeschool Catalog . You check this out article for facts about that need to know is Homeschool Catalog .

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Though there may be times when this is proper it is not proper when Jr. Is less than 5 years of age! Why? Because your child needs to receive training in allowable and proper behavior. Screaming to get your own way is not allowable or acceptable! If your child is screaming to get something, there are reasons he is doing this and I caution you, you may not like them!

First, your child has been taught to scream. That's right, taught. I know it isn't pleasant and I know you didn't do it intentionally, but bear with me...it is true, you taught him to scream! When babies begin to gain their independence they found personal tastes for foods, people, their environment and even situations. In other words, they start to know what they want in life. The problem? They have a wee amount of ways to tell what they want because they have not mastered language yet. So what do they do? They wave their arms, they kick their feet, they point, they make noise, and when that doesn't work, they muster up, and let out a blood curdling scream. Yikes!

What do you do?

Guess what??? Mom comes running and often dad and sister too! So, the kid screams more. If they want something else? They scream again. The qoute is if you react to this screaming by enchanting faster, it will stop, temporarily. It will stop until the child decides he wants something else. In reality, reacting by enchanting faster will make the screaming worse! Yikes again, right? The child will condition you to move a wee faster and then? Then, you begin to anticipate the child's needs so that he won't scream at all. Does the word servant come to mind here? Wrong! Pretty soon the child is screaming about all things and it he sees that it works much great than the new language he is learning so he screams instead of talks! Ouch! Next thing you know, mom and dad are screaming at each other for the screaming to stop. Sound familiar?

Do you want to know the rules so the insanity will stop? (view definition of insanity here)

Rule # 1 Don't ignore it.

This is the amount one thing I hear parents say that they do. It is your job as the parent to teach and train the child allowable behavior. If you ignore the crummy screaming the child doesn't know the disagreement in the middle of proper or unacceptable behavior. Children need to know the boundaries if you want happy, independent and responsible children. Do you see happy citizen screaming to get their own way? Only unhappy adults do that! If you really want your children to grow up and respect other people, (including you), you have to teach them "why" screaming is disrespectful to others. They need the "why" behind the discipline. Train them not to scream and then give them the suspect why they shouldn't scream. Remember to talk at their level. You might say, "Other citizen don't want to hear you scream, it hurts their ears. You must learn to operate your emotions and make yourself happy. We must all respect the ownership of the others in order to get along." What you are really doing is teaching them to expert themselves. It is a young part in self-control. Mom and dad might be able to ignore screaming and fits but do we all have to undergo your kid screaming? Ignoring is not the answer.

How do you do it?

Now that you know why you should train your child not to scream, how do you do it? Tell the child in a calm, level voice to stop raising his voice. Put your index finger firmly over his mouth and set him somewhere out of the way. In our household we use the lowest step of our stairway. The child must go sit on the step until they are ready to ask in a nice voice just what it is that they they want. The child is always in operate of the time frame. It is their decision to stop screaming and ask nicely. As a parent, you are there for guidance. You are naturally making it inconvenient for them to scream. This is incentive for them to convert their own poor behavior and it avoids power struggles. If they get up from the step and they are still screaming...take them back and sit them there over and over until they get it. If they are calling your name and asking if they can get up, clarify to them in a nice voice that it is their selection when they get up and they can get up when they convert their mind and decree not to scream anymore.

Rule # 2 Be consistent.

If you are in a store or communal area. Again, put your finger firmly over their mouth and say, "No, you may not scream, you must use a nice voice and ask for what you want." (If the child is too young to talk, think teaching them basic signs to ask nicely for what they want. Watch time to come issues for more on baby signing). If they continue to scream, stand your ground and discipline them agreeing to the parenting plan you are currently working. If you haven't created your parenting plan, you may not have a policy of operation for this behavior. I would encourage you to get one. (Check out our parenting plan, family by Design) If you don't have a plan, you will most really fall into emotional parenting and that is not good for you or the child.

Rule # 3 Don't scream at your child.

Gandhi said it perfectly when he said, be the convert you want to see in other people. This is especially true with your children. Be what you want them to be because they will be what you are. Learn to operate yourself and your emotions and your children will reflect that back to you.

Rule # 4 Never, ever, ever, Ever, give in to the screaming.

It is your job as the parent to teach your child to be aware of others colse to him and respect their rights. He is not the town of the universe. Please don't treat your child like he is or he will be an unhappy adult. If you really love him, teach him to get along with others straight through teaching the significance of allowable behavior.

The next time you are tempted to ignore screaming, ask yourself, do you like to hear man else's kid screaming to get their way? I think not.

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